Uninvited Guest.
(As narrated by Ajitha(translated by Padma Mahadev)
After my husband’s
death I moved to Bengaluru to be with my
eldest daughter- my two other daughters are in USA.. Eldest daughter had to
move to Chennai . I longed for visitors and God sent me a Visitor!
Who was the guest? CANCER!- Breast cancer!! Although I was
living on my ,own, I did not panic or lose hope. I held on to my courage and
fought like the famous Indian queen of Jhansi. The love, support and prayers of
my loved ones helped me to overcome this ordeal. Roles changed! My daughters
became my Mother and their spouse my sons!! My illness also brought home my
loved ones as visitors . After the initial treatment was over, they arranged for a home nurse to help me out . I
remember the time ,when my daughters were leaving -seeing them go, couldn’t
control the tears in my eyes and my daughter stopped and said – Mother seeing
those tears my legs refused to move and they changed their travel plans!! This
made me pull in all my resources and love concern for them to let them go back to
their lives. It was agonizing to see them go and I was paralyzed for 12 hours.
At the time of surgery my jewels were replaced with tubes
and I smiled at the sight and the nurse was shocked to see me smile at such a
grave moment and she also smiled when I explained and those are my different
type of jewels.
My eldest son-in law
would come down from Chennai during the
chemo therapy. While undergoing chemo, I was reminded of Chandra Gupta Maurya and the Vish Kanyas, who were fed with
poison from an young age and they were
used to kill the enemies of the state. Similarly to destroy Cancer I became
vish kanya. (poison maiden) Don’t be
alarmed, I am not going to harm anybody! This poison will only affect me and
like Mira’s poison this became nectar. I had to undergo 3 chemos and 25 radio therapy and followed by
another 3 more chemo’s. All the 4
doctors were very competent and treated me with love and care. Their team work
gave me confidence and I decided to work at recovering my old life. I feel thankful
to God for this grace. My second son-in-law supported me during the radiation
treatment which was in Ramiah quite a distance from my residence. I looked
forward to the daily trips and visualized that as a picnic and reminded myself
to be cheerful and enthusiastic
Post Chemo, I started losing hair, fortunately, was not
totally bald. It was second childhood for me and real childhood for my grand
daughter ! There was competition between us as to whose hair was growing
faster,the difference being she had black hair and mine is grey!! My granddaughter
was used my visits during her summer vacation and she would phone me asking why
I was not going this time. She would beg me with promises that we will have fun
., little knowing that ‘fun’ for me was
radiation,i.v and tests. She felt confused that her grandmother who speaks so lovingly on the phone was n;ot coming to be
with her.
This uninvited visitor taught me many lessons. There was a
change in me. I recognized who were my real friends. I also became aware of my
supportive friends from Nagpur, Gujrath,Mumbai,Pune,USA- people from all over
reached out to me. I got acquainted with other cancer support groups-Ashtha
Breast Cancer group in particular,
chairperson -Madhavi tai would keep sending encouraging messages that
helped me. I heard of Connect To Heal, after my treatment was over. The
meetings held was close to my house-this is like the child is in the house, yet
I go searching all over the town for the child!! I do not attend their meetings regularly due
to my Sanskrit classes, bhajan mandali and travelling all over to different
temples and other places of interest. They are my local support and clarify any
doubts that plague me.
I acknowledge my gratitude to this ‘Visitor’, who along with
anguish and pain has also given me many blessings. My faith in God has
multiplied. The timid girl of past has become Jhansi Ki Rani. Reading this you
may conclude that life is a bed of roses for me-on the contrary- there are
troubles and I have learnt now ,to look at it from a different perspective. THIS MADE A DIFFERENCE! Five
years ago an Instructor from Vivekananda Yoga Kendra had said Enjoy the pain! I use to wonder-
how can this be? Now, I am beginning to grasp that message. Instead of changing
the situation Change Self.
Share joy with others.
Jyoth se jyoth lagate chalo,
Anand ki Ganga bahate chalo.
Ajitha has
started a Prayer Group. Anyone who wants to be prayed for and would like
to join are welcome.anyone who wishes are welcome .
She can be contacted at 91-9900870046.)
No comments:
Post a Comment